Mini update.

Hi all!

I decided to not do a FET cycle this month. The clinic told me to call when I’m ready, but they didn’t give me Letrozole. That is OK, I had a refill left and I used it. Not that I’m expecting to suddenly conceive on my own, but I don’t want to lose my regular cycles.

Hopefully I’ll be back around here soon.

Love,

Mrs. Hope.

Anxiety.

fertilityI haven’t updated this blog lately because I’m not sure what to say…We are currently on CD 10. I took Letrozole 5 mg from CD 3 to 7. I also started Gonal F 100 IU on CD 5.

We are doing mini-IVF (low medication cycle) because of my high risks of OHSS. My AHM levels are too high and I was afraid of doing a fully medicated cycle. I asked the doctor and he agreed with me. But now I’m wondering if I made the right decision.

So far I have four follicles, as expected. If I did the fully medicated cycle, it could have been uneventful, but if I got OHSS, I may have ended up with a high hospital bill that we can’t afford. I’ve read about other cases of women losing an ovary. I don’t know, the whole thing was too scary for me.

Now I’m just praying that everything goes well. The medicines and monitoring were so expensive. This is very stressing for me.

The non-supportive TTC community.

When we started this journey two years ago, there was a lot of things I didn’t know. Even today, I’m still learning new things every day.  It was thanks to an online forum that I discovered the 21-day progesterone test doesn’t need to be on day 21 specifically (it should be done 7-10 days after ovulation).

So, every time I read someone going through something that we already experienced, I try to give advice. Not because I know better, but because I would like to help others save time, money, energy, etc. I would love to have known from the beginning that I shouldn’t have taken Letrozole for more than 6 months without results. That my PCOS needed to be treated too.  That IVF wasn’t as impossible as I thought because CNY exists…

But to my surprise, people don’t like advise. People don’t take them well. People don’t want them. So, from now on, I’m not giving them anymore (on others’ posts). I will continue to write about our journey and experience. If someone really needs the help and the advice, I hope we can be of use.

Love,

Mrs. H.

Just relax.

Just relax, that is the funniest phrase I’ve heard since we are TTC. Relax? Really?

Let’s see:

  • Day 1 one your period: call RE. Make sure they send the medicines to the Pharmacy.
  • Day 3 to 7: Don’t forget to take those little monsters each day at bedtime.
  • Day 10 until Ovulation: Don’t forget to pee every morning in the pee stick. We don’t want to miss the ovulation window.
  • Day of the smiley face: Hurry, let’s have sex! Stop everything.
  • 8 days after ovulation: Is too early, don’t test yet.
  • 9 days after ovulation: BFN, but there is still hope.
  • 10 days after ovulation until period: Hanging in there.
  • Period day: Oh crap. Cry (the first cycles, after a while you are used to it). Call RE. Start again.

I would love for the “just relax committee” to explain how exactly I can achieve that, lol. I would also love to learn how relaxing is going to help my body ovulate on its own (without the medicines).

I know most people are just trying to be nice. I’m mostly upset at the ones that understand the process and still say it.

PS: This was a venting post. Sometimes reading those TTC forums have that effect on people. 

The unspoken truth.

Disclaimer: This post is not for everybody and contains information that some people may not like.

Let me start by saying that I understand this experience is different for everybody. But since this blog is therapeutic for me, I’m going to be talking about something that I suspect happens a lot more than we want to admit. Today’s topic is how our journey to conceive affects our sex life.

To begin with, there are few things less arousing that the phrase “we need to have sex today, I’m ovulating”. Yes, I know that foreplay exists and I know that you can leave it to the imagination, but after 12 rounds of Letrozole, you know that you have to try, even if it is 8 pm on a weekday night and you are both tired.

I’m also aware that Letrozole doesn’t have the same effects on every woman. For me, with the hot flashes comes the dryness. That on top of the unexplained cystitis that I’ve been suffering for almost 3 years. Then comes the fact that lubricants are not good for the baby-making process, so you do the math…

Now I’m working on enjoying life a little bit more, and trying to forget all the tests and days, and things like that. For example, I forgot that I was supposed to start tracking my LH surge today. It is hard because you want to follow the treatment, even if it hasn’t worked, but you also want to have a happy life.

My husband and I continue to be in love, and we still want to create a family, but this has been another thing we are learning to overcome as a couple. We talk a lot, we communicate, we try. But I wanted to put it out there in case that someone else is going thru something similar.

Life is not perfect by any means. We just need to make it work.