I’m a mom.

Hi all! I’ve been postponing this update for so long, that it never seems to be a good time to do it. To summarize: I’m a mom.

If you followed our journey you know that our IVF failed in May. After that, we decided to take a one month break before trying again. We wanted to try in July because I accepted a new job as a teacher.

When I got my period after the failed IVF I asked the clinic for letrozole to guarantee my next period because I don’t usually ovulate. They said no. I noticed I had a refill left so I decided to take it anyways. After my ovulation date, I started to use the leftover progesterone suppositories I had and estradiol (vaginally). It was a “what’s the worst it could happen” kind of thinking. We also visited a Saint in St. Augustine, FL, that helps families trying to conceive.

9 days after my ovulation date I took an Amazon cheapie pregnancy test (like every month) before calling to order the new round of IVF meds. For the 1st time in my life, I saw a light second line. My heart almost stopped. I called my husband, he wasn’t sure that it was there. I got a First Response that I’ve been saving forever and it showed the line a little bit darker. I was pregnant!

You can imagine the number of tests that I did between that moment (Saturday morning) and Monday afternoon when I got the beta results back. My estradiol levels were a little bit low, my THS levels were high, but they adjusted the medicines. There I was. Pregnant. I couldn’t believe it. No insemination, no in vitro, the old-fashion way…

Maintaining my sanity.

pexels-photoThis TTC thing is very complicated.

I had this fertility app on my cellphone with lots of forums and discussions about fertility treatments, gone!

I had another app to keep track of my symptoms, not anymore!

Every month around 8-10 dpo I have cramps or sore boobs and I convince myself that I’m pregnant, well, not anymore!

The only thing I know for sure is that I’m ovulating, I’m doing my best and it will happen… I don’t know when, but I will happen. And my little Luna has done wonders to my mood, I’m less depressed and I’m content.

My little baby  and my love give me love and company and that’s something to be grateful for.

Don’t think that I don’t get frustrated every month. I do. But I’m not surprise anymore. I don’t test everyday like crazy. Now I know is not up to me.

My RE wants to wait until the 6th month of treatment is over before moving forward and I guess we’ll do that. We’ll see.

 

The pimples.

Every cycle before I get my period, I get two pimples. Guess what I have since yesterday? My two pimples! So that means the waiting game it’s over and now I know for sure I’m not pregnant.

Yesterday I had a brief moment of hope after I got a very strange sharp-like pain on my left ovary. It was more like a twinge and it hit me when I was walking to the copy machine at work. It was very brief and then I had it again at home, while walking towards the mailbox.

I thought, mmm, this could be implantation? But I guess no!

I’m exhausted. This trying is exhausting. Last Christmas I thought, by next year, we’ll have our little baby. Well, it didn’t happen.